Love & the Disability Factor, part four

When it comes to the longing for love, I’m not the only one with fears related to the disability factor. I’m not alone in feeling this dream of mine can seem impossible.

I’ve read books and blogs, and emailed a few. Other people with disabilities admit similar insecurities. There are also stories of marriages involving disability that are beautiful, strong, and thriving.

We need to see it is okay to carry these fears. We also need to know what to do with them and how to keep the right amount of hope alive.

Here is a FOR FURTHER READING list:

  • Considerations for Dating Someone in a Wheelchair
    “Personal care needs may be the most common reason that people will pass by a wheelchair user when looking for potential dates. While there are people who do need daily assistance with their personal care needs that job will not fall on you. You’re a date, not a PCA.”
  • So, You Wanna Ask Me Out
    “Realize that I will think you’re joking. I do not believe you find me attractive because society has told me that I am ugly due to my disability. I will question your intentions…”
  • Dating with Disabilities
    “I was used to suddenly becoming invisible to someone I was interested in. Most men can’t see past the chair.”…He listened to the smarter half, walked over, and introduced himself. “I felt like I was crossing a barrier I didn’t even know was there,” Stephen said.
  • 9 Things I Wish People Knew About Dating Someone in a Wheelchair
    “Love is love and a person is a person, no matter the piece of equipment they lug around.”
    (please ignore a few bad words in this article.)
  • To My Boyfriend, Whose Love Doesn’t See a Disability
    “I have been in relationships, but they never lasted more than a couple of months. The boys couldn’t see past my disability. They got sick of helping me. I always felt like having someone help me was a “burden” on them…I ended up not trusting guys, until you came along.”
  • To the Man Who Wants to Marry Me
    “I once believed that no man would want to spend the rest of his life with me, let alone date me.”
  • When a Stranger Saw My Wheelchair and Called My Husband ‘a Good Man’
    “He was saying my husband was a good man because he was willing to be with me, a girl in a wheelchair…My husband and I have an equal partnership that is built on love, trust, and faith in each other. It has nothing to do with my disability.”
  • My Spouse Isn’t Different
    “I am a pretty great person, but it’s not because I chose to marry someone that you see as disabled…No marriage is foolproof or without trials. Why do they think that living with a disability makes us different? Yes, there are things our spouses require assistance with during the day, but so do their spouses!”

And these books: